


Nightmares

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: NaLu [1]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Love, Love Confessions, Memories, Nightmares, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-03 02:28:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16317422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: It's been over a month since the Grand Magic Games, but Natsu is only now beginning to face up to what he saw happen to Lucy. Instead of reaching out for help he tries to deal with it on his own, but Lucy refuses to let that happen and instead seizes the opportunity for thm both to move forwards.





	Nightmares

_Happy and Lucy were knelt beside the fallen form of Future-Lucy and Natsu wanted nothing more than to move forward and join them, to offer the girl who had come back to save them some comfort, to promise that he would save her future. But his legs wouldn’t respond to his commands and was only vaguely aware of the tremors running through him, tears trickling down his cheeks as he heard the Exceed desperately pleading with her to hold on. Lucy…she wasn’t his Lucy, the one that he had brought to Fairy Tail and who had rapidly become his best friend and possibly something more, but that knowledge did little to alleviate the pain in his heart, and he found himself agreeing wholeheartedly with what his partner was saying. It didn’t matter when or where she was from, she was still Lucy._

_Somehow that thought was enough to get him moving forward, but he had barely got half-way when the Future-Lucy went completely still, and he didn’t need the wails from Happy and his Lucy to know that she was gone, and he felt himself stagger slightly as grief hit him. However, the knowledge that his Lucy was still alive and needing protecting was enough for him to straighten, and with a growl, he whirled around to face her attacker._

_“I’ll protect your future Lucy!” He promised fiercely, determined to make sure that the future she had escaped from never had a chance to come true._

_“What are you talking about Natsu?” Happy demanded, and Natsu whirled around to find the cat staring up at him wide, horrified eyes, tears streaking down his cheeks and Natsu felt an odd sense of foreboding settling over him even before the cat sobbed out. “Lucy’s gone!”_

_“No!” Natsu denied at once, scrubbing fiercely at the tears he could still feel on his cheeks, wondering what on earth had got into the Exceed as he added loudly. “Our Lucy is still here. Look there she…” He turned to where their Lucy had been sat only seconds before, coming up short when he realised that she was no longer there even though she hadn’t seemed to be a state to move. Frantically he turned around trying to find her, distantly noticing that Loke had disappeared as well, and there was a note of fresh panic in his voice as he called to her. “Lucy? Lucy where are you?”_

_“Natsu-san please stop it!” Wendy cried desperately as she ran to him, wrapping an arm around his in an attempt to stop his search efforts, and his heart clenched as he glanced down at her and took in the grief in her eyes and the tears streaking her cheeks. “You need to snap out of it! Lucy is…Lucy is…”_

_“No…” He shook his head desperately, yanking himself out of her grip as he whirled around, denials still falling from his lips even as doubt began to creep into his heart…he hadn’t imagined the second Lucy, had he? She had been there…she had saved his Lucy…  “No that’s not true…it can’t be true…”_

_“But it is Natsu Dragneel,” Future-Rogue’s voice rang out cold and mocking, and the Fire mage snarled furiously as he turned to look at the other Dragon-slayer, hands clenching at his side as he caught the mocking smirk before Rogue added coolly. “I killed her because you were too weak to stop me.”_

_“Shut up!” Natsu snarled as he charged forward, flames wrapping around his fists as he lashed out wildly at the other Dragon-slayer who easily avoided his wild onslaught. There were fresh tears on his cheeks as he cried out frantically. “Give her back! Give Lucy back!”_

     Natsu jerked awake with a gasp, sitting up in a flurry of tangled limbs and blankets as he glanced around with wide-eyes, the images far too close as his heart hammered loudly in his chest. _Lucy!_ It was only as his eyes landed on the familiar features of his own room that he realised that he’d woken up from yet another nightmare, and he let out a soft sob as relief crashed over him. _Lucy is alive and safe._ Right now she was probably happily curled up in her own bed fast asleep, probably dreaming up romantic scenes for the novel she was writing or dreaming about her Spirits. She wasn’t hurt or dying or dead, and yet his breathing was still coming hard and fast, his heart aching as he bowed his head and he let out a muffled groan as he realised that he was crying.

“Natsu?” The sudden voice made him start violently, and he hastily swiped a hand over his eyes as he turned to find Happy standing at the edge of his bed and peering up with wide eyes. “Are you okay?” For a moment he flashed back to the dream, to Happy peering up at him in horror and he had to fight the urge to push the Exceed away, and it took him a moment to get his voice to work and he did it came out as a weak croak.

“Yeah…”

“Are you sure?” Happy didn’t look convinced, and the Dragon-slayer wondered just how wrecked he must be looking to get that kind of response, but there was no way he wanted to go into detail about what he had been dreaming about, the images still playing through his mind and far too close for comfort.

“It was just a nightmare,” he replied dismissively, hoping that would be enough to discourage Happy’s interest, wanting the Exceed to leave him alone so that he could sort himself out. However, it seemed as though Happy hadn’t got the message as he looked even more concerned now, his paws tightening on the edge of his blankets and Natsu fought the urge to squirm under the searching gaze now fixated on him.

“About?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Natsu snapped, wincing at his own tone as Happy shot him a hurt look and he sighed slightly before mumbling a quiet apology. “Sorry, I just don’t want to talk about it.” The Exceed didn’t look any happier with that response, and the Dragon-slayer could feel irrational irritation rising in his chest, and he hastily rolled over and tried to bury himself under the covers.

“Natsu…”

“I’m going back to sleep,” he mumbled cutting off the Exceed, waiting tensely to see how Happy was going to reply and he was relieved when after a few minutes the cat let out a soft sigh before moving away from the bed and headed back to his own. Still, he didn’t dare move again until his sharp ears finally picked up the sound of Happy’s breathing easing back into an easy pattern, and then with a sigh, he rolled onto his back and stared blankly up at the ceiling. This wasn’t the first nightmare he’d had about that fight, they had started up a few days before, but they seemed to be getting worse rather than better, and he had no idea what to do about it. “Lucy is fine,” he whispered, careful not to wake the Exceed but needing to hear the words aloud for his own sake.

_Lucy is fine, and I won’t let anything else happen to her._

****

One Week Later:

   Natsu sighed wearily as he collapsed into a heap on the couch, for once glad that Happy had decided to take off to spend the day with Lily and Carla, leaving him to his own devices. It had been growing harder and harder to keep pretending that he was okay, especially as his partner had a tendency to be able to see through his masks as though they didn’t exist. He knew that the Exceed was aware that he’d been having some problems with nightmares, but he didn’t seem to be aware of the fact that he had progressed to the stage where he was being woken at least once a night by nightmares. Or that it had now got to the point where he was doing everything in his power to stop himself from falling asleep in the first place. Not easy when they shared a bedroom, or when his partner was a ridiculously light sleeper. Although lately, it had seemed that the events of the last few months had caught up with the Exceed as well as he hadn’t woken at all the last few nights, either that or he was pretending to allow the Dragon-slayer to save face.

    Rubbing at his eyes that were feeling dry and itchy from lack of sleep he turned his gaze to the ceiling, stifling a yawn that was threatening to break free. _The question is why is this happening now?_ He wasn’t a stranger to nightmares, he had been plagued with them in the days after Igneel had disappeared and again after Lisanna had appeared to die, but that had been times when he was grieving and unable or reluctant to share it with others. Now, although he could understand the reason behind the nightmares, after all, there was no way that he could’ve watched Lucy, even if it wasn’t really his Lucy, die right in front of his eyes, and not have nightmares about it. No, the question was why they were happening over a month after the event, especially when nothing had happened recently to set them off, as the only thing they’d done recently was a couple of small, unmemorable jobs in the local area trying to give themselves a break from their streak of bad luck.

“So why the hell is it bothering me now?” He grumbled aloud as he sank into the back of the sofa, feeling completely and utterly drained, with the urge to fall asleep and relieve that feeling growing stronger by the moment, and he pinched himself harshly in the leg when he felt his eyes threatening to close. “Got to stay awake,” he muttered as he forced himself to his feet, only to find himself swaying slightly as the room span around him for a moment and he hastily slammed his eyes shut as the sensation made his stomach roll, and he baulked as he swallowed the urge to throw up. _Blasted motion sickness._

    Once he felt steadier, he cautiously inched his eyes open again, frowning as he realised just how difficult it was to get them open again. _Am I that bad that I’m going to start falling asleep on my feet now?_ He through incredulously, although he knew that the dizziness was a bad sign and that he really needed to get some rest, but the prospect of being faced with the image of Lucy falling, his hand closing just short of that cursed attack. Frantically he shook his head to clear the memory, feeling his eyes stinging and he hastily headed for the door. He would go to the guild, check on Lucy with his own eyes and hopefully find a better way of staying awake, although he was worried that the others would notice just how tired he was, somehow doubting that they would be brushed off by a simple excuse.

_Still,_ _I’ll deal with that when I have too…_

****

    Lucy sighed softly as she glanced up from her notebook, still somewhat disappointed that there was no sign of Natsu yet as she had been hoping to talk him into taking a small job with her, just the two of them and Happy if he wanted to come. As much as she loved being in their larger team, she did miss the days when it was just the three of them, and things had seemed much simpler, besides none of them were particularly in need of Jewels right now so they could just go for something fun. _And hopefully, without too many chances for him to destroy everything,_ she thought with a small smile, while most of the time she scolded him for his destructive tendencies she had long since accepted it as another necessary part of his personality.

“Are you alright Lucy?” Erza’s voice made her jump, and she turned to find the red-head sliding onto the stool next to her, a plate of cheesecake magically appearing in front of her as Mira breezed past with a cheerful wave.

“Of course,” Lucy replied with a smile even as she instinctively covered her notebook, only seconds before Erza’s eyes drifted towards it and her smile grew as she caught the disappointment that flickered across the other girl’s expression. Clearly, she had been teaming up with Levy again to try and work out what her book was about and how it was going, but while the Solid Script mage went for the direct approach every time, the re-quip mage had taken to subtler approaches. “I’m just waiting for Natsu to show his face; I want to go on a job.”

“Just the two of you?” Erza asked with a grin, waggling her eyebrows at the Celestial mage who immediately blushed despite her best attempts to stop herself, and she ducked her head before blurting desperately.

“And Happy!” She hesitated for a moment as she glanced across to the corner where the three Exceeds were sat chatting, watching as Happy trailed off, losing his train of thought as he stared at Carla and there was laughter in her voice as she added quietly.  “If he wants to come…You don’t mind do you?” Lucy asked nervously at the end, realising that she hadn’t spoken to the others about her plans and suddenly worried that she might offend them.

“Of course not,” Erza waved off her concern with a smile, savouring a bite of her cake with a blissful expression before continuing. “I’m off to look at some new armours tomorrow so I’ll be gone for a few days anyway, Wendy is doing some training with Porlyusica, and I overheard Gray actually agreeing to a job with Juvia.”

“Really?” Lucy demanded twisting in her seat as she tried to spot the pair, but there was no sign of the Water mage, while Gray looked to be in deep discussion with Elfman about something, and she winced, easily able to predict another bar brawl breaking out from that conversation. “She must be so excited!”

“I think she nearly fainted when he turned around and said yes,” Erza shared a smile with the Celestial mage, both aware of how long Juvia had been waiting for that to happen and relieved that whatever had happened between them during the Magical Games seemed to have given the Ice mage the impetus to give in. Her expression turned more serious after a moment, and she shifted her attention back to her cake, setting aside her fork with a sigh and Lucy glanced at her in confusion.

“Erza?”

“Have you noticed that Natsu’s been a bit off the last week or so?” Erza asked quietly after a moment as she glanced up at Lucy. The Celestial mage hesitated for a moment, before giving a small nod, it was one of the reasons she was so keen to do a job with just the three of them, hoping that with no one else around he might open up about what was bothering him. She’d tried asking him a couple of days ago, but he’d laughed it off and changed the subject, but he hadn’t been able to banish the shadows from his eyes, or the fix his weaker than normal grin and if anything, he seemed to have got worse since then.

“I’m worried about him,” she admitted quietly.

“I thought as much,” Erza replied with a satisfied nod at Lucy’s response, not that she had expected the other girl to miss something like that, her expression softening as she added quietly.  “I asked him about it as well, but he blew me off…but…”

“But?”

“I might have an idea what’s bothering him,” Erza admitted quietly, unsurprised when brown eyes widened with a mixture of hope and outrage in response to her words. Silently wondering if Lucy realised just how open she was with her reactions when it came to the Fire mage? Not that she had intention of mentioning it now. 

“What?” Lucy demanded, unable to believe that the other girl hadn’t done more to drag the truth out of Natsu if she even suspected that she knew what was wrong, but she forced herself to take a deep breath before continuing in a marginally calmer tone of voice. “What is it?”

“I might be wrong, it’s just a guess,” Erza cautioned her, not wanting to make the situation worse if she was completely off base, although she was fairly confident in her ability to read the Dragon-slayer after all these years.

“I don’t care,” Lucy said firmly, meeting Erza’s gaze without hesitation even as she felt her cheeks heating up further as she added with a hint of desperation. “I just want him to smile like normal!” It wasn’t that he hadn’t been smiling, but it was forced and weaker than the blinding grin that she’d come to love and associate with home. The expression he’d worn that first day when he’d held his hand out to someone who was nearly a complete stranger and asked her to join his family, making her dream come true and unknowingly offering a whole sleuth of new dreams. _Natsu…_

“He’s having nightmares, and probably refusing to sleep so that he can avoid them,” Erza continued after a moment, fighting the urge to smile at the affection and possibly love in the Celestial mage’s face when she spoke of Natsu, although Lucy’s expression had rapidly darkened at her words. “He’s done it before, back when we first thought that Lisanna was dead…he was off for nearly a month back then before he managed to get himself back on his feet and I think he mentioned having them when Natsu first disappeared as well. I just don’t know what could have caused them this time.” It had been bad during the Lisanna situation, and she could remember him coming back badly injured from a simple job because the sleep deprivation had slowed his reactions, and, in the end, Makarov had forbidden him from working until he was able to sort himself out, and that had been the push Natsu needed. Somehow, she doubted that work in this situation and she just hoped that Lucy might be able to do something as she hated the thought of Natsu suffering alone.

    Lucy was silent as she contemplated what Erza had said, her gaze drifting briefly to where Lisanna was leant against the end of the bar chatting with her sister. _Natsu had nightmares about her?_ She always regretted the fact that she had missed out on sharing their childhood, as it always left her feeling slightly out of her depth in situations like this, and yet Erza had turned to her rather than Natsu’s childhood friend, and she drew confidence from that. _Okay, Heartfilia think…what could have set him off, if its only death and abandonment that’s set off his nightmares before?_ She winced in sympathy at that thought, having had more than a few nightmares herself both times she had lost a parent, and the days before she had run away had been plagued with nightmares about the worsening relationship between herself and her father. However, that wasn’t going to help her work out what was bothering Natsu… _Nothing has happened since we got back from Crocus, so what…oh!_ A thought flashed across her mind, and she blanched…

“Lucy?”

“I-I might know what’s wrong…” Lucy said hesitantly, swallowing hard as she felt her eyes stinging, _oh Natsu has that been bothering you all that time?_ He had seemed fine once everything was over and he had acted like his usual idiotic self at the Palace, and up until a couple of weeks ago he hadn’t seemed to be having problems, and she couldn’t understand why it was bothering him now. Realising that Erza was still watching her with an expectant expression, she sighed before elaborating.  “He saw the Future-me die back in Crocus, he even tried to stop the attack that hit her…and he was crying when he attacked Future-Rogue right afterwards. He grieved for her even though she wasn’t really me…” She had been so confused and torn by the loss of her future self that she had never really stopped to consider his reaction, and afterwards, there had been so much happening that they hadn’t had the chance to discuss what had happened in the Palace and she had just let the topic go. _I’m so sorry Natsu…_

“Yeah that would be enough to do it,” Erza agreed softly, she had heard a rough outline of what had happened in the Palace, but she had never given it much thought, after all, they had all been more preoccupied with the fact that they had survived the Dragons and won the Grand Magic games. Her heart ached at the thought of the idiotic Fire mage trying to deal with something like that on his own, aware that he always felt everything strongly especially when it came to friends and family, and even more so when it came down to the Celestial Mage.  “He really does care about you.”

“I know…” Lucy murmured glancing aside as she blushed stronger than before, sucking in a nervous breath before closing her notebook with a sharp movement and sliding off the stool, her embarrassment being masked with determination as she straightened.

“Where are you going?” Erza asked even though she already had a good idea.

“He can’t work like this,” Lucy replied sternly, her expression softening slightly as she glanced back at the red-head before adding strongly. “But I can fix this! Will you ask Happy if he can stay at Wendy’s for the next couple of days at least, or take him with you when you go on your trip?” She knew that the Exceed cared about Natsu and would probably be able to help him, but this was something that she wanted to take care of herself, and she had an odd feeling that the Dragon-slayer would be more willing to open up to her if it was just the two of them.

“Of course,” Erza agreed easily, silently praying that Wendy would be able to take the Exceed as she had been armour shopping with Natsu and Happy in tow before and it wasn’t an experience she was keen to repeat, even if she’d only have to put up with one of them. “And Lucy?” She added as she realised that the Celestial mage was already moving away from her.

“Yeah?”

“Make sure that you really mean whatever you say to him,” Erza cautioned, not that she really thought the other girl would lie to the Dragon-slayer. And it was clear from the expression on Lucy’s face when she glanced back at her that the very thought of it offended the blonde and she smiled even before the other replied heatedly.

“I will,” with a brisk wave Lucy headed for the door, determined to get to the bottom of all of this before it could get any worse and determined to help Natsu even if he tried to push her away.

_Stupid Dragon-slayer trying to deal with everything on his own…_

**

   Natsu could feel his eyes beginning to droop as he trudged up the stairs towards the guild, idly wondering if Gray was around, fighting the Ice Princess would be an excellent way to keep himself awake although it would mean risking Erza’s wrath…and possibly Lucy’s…He perked up slightly at the thought of the Celestial mage, needing the reassurance of seeing her in person to help banish the lingering fear from the brief nightmare he’d had the night before when he’d lost his battle against sleep. He was just reaching for the door handle when it suddenly slammed open, and he stumbled backwards, only just avoiding getting a door to the face and letting out a startled squawk as a warm body slammed into him instead.

“Natsu?!” He immediately recognised Lucy’s voice and hastily wrapped his arm around her, tensing his legs as he steadied them both before they could tumble down the stairs, sighing as her familiar scent flooded his nose and he couldn’t keep the small smile of his lips. _Lucy._ The relief that she was safe and the feel of her warmth made him hold on for a moment, but when she coughed slightly, he felt himself blushing before hastily releasing her and taking a step back. Half expecting a punch or kick which was her usual method of dealing with him when he’d overstepped the mark (usually when he sneaked into her flat uninvited…or her bed).

“Are you alright?”  He asked, realising that she was red in the face and worried that she had been hurt even though he had managed to catch her. His voice seemed to snap her out of her daze, and she shook her head briefly before smiling up at him, and he felt his breath catch slightly.

“I’m fine, sorry for nearly bowling you over,” Lucy glanced back at the door, realising just how close she had come to hitting him with the door and shooting him an apologetic look.

“Is everything alright?” Natsu asked with a slight frown, usually on lazy days she enjoyed hanging out in the guild from morning till night, so he wasn’t sure what to make of her abrupt departure in the middle of the morning especially as he caught the slightly worried look behind her smile.

“I was looking for you,” Lucy replied, wanting to roll her eyes at that fact that the idiot was still more worried about her even when he was having problems of his own. _‘He really cares about you,’_ Erza’s words echoed in her mind, and she swallowed hard at the physical evidence of that statement, before straightening as she gathered her determination.

“Well here I am, what’s wr…?” Natsu found himself cut off as Lucy suddenly grabbed his arm, yanking him around and tugging him along beside her as she headed down the stairs. It took a moment for him to stop the world spinning around him, and when it had settled, he cautiously called to her, not making any attempt to escape from her surprisingly strong grip. “Lucy?”

“You’re coming with me,” Lucy replied glancing back at him, and he was startled to realise her earlier smile had disappeared and replaced by the determined expression she usually adopted when they were facing off against a strong opponent, and he wondered what could have happened to put that expression on her face.  “We have some stuff to talk about.”

“We do?” He asked in confusion, automatically trying to think of what he had done wrong recently but coming up empty, he hadn’t even been overly destructive on their last few jobs, so they hadn’t lost out on any of their payment. Lucy didn’t reply verbally, instead giving a small nod as she focused on pulling him along and he sighed before deciding that it was easier to just go along with it, moving so that she was no longer dragging him and brightening when she flashed him a small smile.

**

    The Dragon-slayer perked up when they turned onto the street where her flat was, he always loved spending time at her flat although usually, she was more focused on trying to chase him out…usually because he’d sneaked in. His thoughts turned longingly to her bed, he hadn’t been lying when he told her that he always slept better in her bed, but then his expression fell as he realised that he wouldn’t be able to take advantage of it this time. There was no way that he was going to risk having a nightmare in front of Lucy! She seemed to have moved past what had happened in the Palace, and he absolutely refused to be the one who dragged up bad memories, she already had more than enough of those to be going on with.

“Here we are,” Lucy’s soft voice broke into his thoughts and he blinked as he realised that they had reached her door, missing the concern in her eyes as she studied him for a moment before she added teasingly.  “No sneaking in through the window this time.” Natsu grinned sheepishly at her words, rubbing awkwardly at the back of his head before letting her shepherd him up the stairs, having to grab the bannister as he felt the world swimming slightly once more. _Don’t you dare faint here,_ he told himself sternly as he heard Lucy’s steps falter behind him for a moment before she carefully edged past him to open the door.

    Lucy frowned as she turned the key, fairly certain that he had just grabbed the bannister for support and she wondered just how long it had been since he’d got some proper sleep. Peeking back at him as she opened the door she took in the pale face, dark shadows and slightly unfocused eyes and sighed, clearly it had been a while, and she immediately revised her original plan of talking to him before getting him to rest. There was no way he was going to be able to have a logical conversation if he was this tired, and she didn’t want to give him an opportunity to misinterpret her words.

“Lucy?” She jolted at the gentle prompt, realising that she had been taking too long and she released a soft hum of acknowledgement as she pushed the door open and stepped in, turning around and waving him in with a smile.

“Take your sandals off,” she ordered as she closed the door, ignoring his startled expression at the new command and instead toeing off her own shoes, waiting impatiently for him to take off his own before beginning to gently push him backwards in the direction of her bed. Ignoring his startled protests as she guided him around the sofa, relieved that he seemed happy enough to follow her directions despite his obvious confusion. However, as soon as the back of his legs collided with the bed he tensed up, and she caught the panic that flickered across his face as he gripped her arms gently, stopping her from pushing him any further.

“What are you doing?” He asked anxiously.

“I think that’s my question,” Lucy replied sternly, meeting his gaze head-on, unsurprised when he glanced off to the side to try and avoid her gaze, and she didn’t let it faze her. “Why are you not sleeping when it’s clear you’re exhausted?” She doubted that would be enough to get him to admit that he was having nightmares, and she still wanted to wait to have the proper discussion about the root of those nightmares, but she knew that he was going to need a push if they were going to get anywhere.

“I’m fine,” Natsu muttered tersely, shifting nervously as he heard her disbelieving snort, before adding quietly. “I just haven’t been sleeping well…” _An understatement,_ he thought bitterly as he hoped that Lucy would be willing to accept that response, and he risked a glance back at her face, uncertain of what to make of the triumphant expression on her face.

“Well there’s the solution,” she declared freeing one of her arms before pointing at the bed behind him, and despite himself, he found himself following her arm, his eyes widening before he turned back to her with a mixture of confusion and alarm.

“Huh?”

“You always say you sleep better here,” Lucy pointed out, before smiling brightly as she rested her free hand against her waist, determined to have her way on this matter as she added cheerfully. “And for once I’m actually giving you permission.” She had never admitted it to him, but she always slept better when he was nearby, and she knew that more than once she had consciously snuggled into his warmth when he’d snuck into her bed…but she had never actually given him permission before, and she felt herself fidgeting nervously as he stared wide-eyed at her for a moment.

“That’s okay,” He stubbornly shook his head, regretting the fact that he couldn’t actually take advantage of the fact that she was actually giving him permission to steal her bed, and he couldn’t stop his hand from snaking behind him and pressing down on the soft mattress even as he added firmly. “I don’t need to sleep.”

“Natsu,” Lucy fought the urge to sigh or hit him, why wouldn’t he just admit the truth? Instead, she narrowed her eyes at him, trying to make her voice as stern as Erza’s when the re-quip mage was really laying down the law with the stubborn idiot. Wishing that she had dragged the red-head along for support, even though she wanted to do this one her own. “You need to sleep, anyone can see that, so please humour me.”

“But…”

“Please?” She pleaded as she caught the flicker of hesitation in his protest, this time allowing all of her concern to show through the sternness, and she knew that she had won when his eyes softened and he let out a defeated sigh.

“Fine…” Natsu agreed, wondering if he would ever be able to hold out against that pleading look, although he was determined that he wasn’t going to fall asleep. Hopefully, if he pretended for a little while, she wouldn’t notice, and he would be able to get out of here without having a nightmare. Seeing her expectant look, he sighed before clambering onto the bed, trying desperately to fight the urge to just melt into the soft mattress as his exhaustion pressed in on him once more. “What are you doing?” He asked in alarm as he realised that she had carefully pulled the covers out from under him, covering him gently before slipping in beside her.

“Making sure that you actually rest,” she told him, catching yet another flicker of panic in his eyes and guessing that she had hit the mark, and she silently arched an eyebrow when he shifted nervously beside her, for once not immediately snuggling up against her like he normally did when he slipped into the bed.

“But…” _I can’t…._

“Sleep,” Lucy ordered, and he realised that she really wasn’t going to back down on the issue, sighing and scowling at her he rolled over, presenting her with his back as he desperately tried to keep his eyes open, even as his body screamed at him to let it rest. A moment later he nearly shot into the air as Lucy cuddled up behind him, barely able to breathe as she felt her bury his face against his shoulder, and despite his best intentions, he felt himself beginning to drift off. “Stop fighting it,” was the last thing he heard before he dozed off, unaware of the Celestial mage pressing a gentle kiss against his guild mark once she was sure that he was fast asleep.

**

    Despite the warmth that Natsu was constantly letting off, Lucy felt no need to sleep, and after cuddling with him for half an hour, she’d carefully sat up in the bed beside him, leaning back against the bedhead as she retrieved the book she had been reading the night before. Glancing at the sleeping Dragon-slayer with a fond smile she found her page and settled in to read. It was slightly too hot being sat so close to the Fire Mage, but she had no intention of moving until he woke up again, worried that the might have another nightmare and determined to be there to deal with it if he did and just hoping that he would let her. She had known that he was going to be reluctant for help, but she hadn’t expected him to be quite as resistant to the idea of sleep as he had been, and she worried how much worse he was going to be when it came to discussing his nightmares.

**

 

     She had been reading for nearly an hour and a half when she felt Natsu shift uneasily beside her, and she immediately dropped the book onto the floor before turning back to the Fire mage with a worried frown. He had been sleeping peacefully up until now, and she had foolishly begun to hope that her presence was enough to keep the nightmares at bay, but as she watched he rolled onto his back, and she frowned as she caught the terrified look on his face. _You’re not supposed to look like that,_ she thought as she reached out and gently began to run her fingers through his hair, hoping that she would be able to ease him out of the dream without more forceful methods.

   However, the Dragon-slayer seemed determined not to make it easy on her, his movements becoming even more restless and she thought her heart might break when he let out a soft whimper, tears beginning to trickle down his cheeks. _This is what you’ve been going through alone?_ She was about to give in to temptation and shake him awake when he abruptly turned, one hand blindly reaching and gripping hers tight enough to bruise and she bit back a wince, although the pain was forgotten as he began to call for her with such pain in his voice that she felt herself welling up as well.

“Lucy? Where are you, Lucy?”

“Easy Natsu I’m right here. I’m right next to you,” She called soothingly, praying that her voice would reach him in the depths of his nightmare, curling her fingers around the hand gripping hers. “We’re both safe because of you.” It might not have been fully intentional, but if he hadn’t slammed Motherglare into the gate they would never have been able to destroy it, and the future would have probably wound up being the same that her Future-self had fled from.  For a moment he seemed to settle under her words and touch, but before she could let out a sigh of relief, he had tensed again, and she gritted her teeth as he whimpered again, the noise grating on her nerves far worse than his pained cry and she frantically called out to him. “Natsu! Come back to me Natsu!”

    She was about to shake him awake, unable to bear the broken-heartened whimpers any longer when he suddenly bolted upright on the bed, his eyes wide and terrified and her name ringing on his lips.

“LUCY!”  She had never heard him call her name with such desperation before, despite the numerous dangerous situations they had wound up in, and without even thinking about it she wrapped her arms tightly around him with a muffled sob. For a moment he went completely tense in her arms, and for a second she wondered if he was going to lash out and she braced herself, only to be caught by surprise when instead overly warm arms crept around her before he buried his face against her. “L-Lucy?”

“Yeah it’s me,” Lucy whispered softly, feeling warm tears soaking into her top as he began to sob in earnest, and she felt tears of her own trickling down her cheeks as she tightened her hold on him. One hand drawing soothing patterns on his back, while she buried the fingers of her other hand into his hair, knowing from experience that he found it soothing. “Let it all out,” she encouraged as she realised that he was trying his best to get himself back under control, knowing that it would help him to bottle it all up again, for a couple of minutes he continued to try and fight it before admitting defeat with a small wail that cut her to the core. _Oh, Natsu…_ The thought that he had been waking up on his own in this state and trying to handle it himself broke her heart, and she vowed to make sure that he knew to come to her in future, even if the dreams had nothing to do with her.

_You’re never going to be on your own again..._

**

    It had taken nearly half an hour for him to cry himself out, and by that point she had eased them both down so that they were lying next to one another, knowing that he was going to be exhausted by the time he was actually finished. Sure enough, when he reluctantly pulled back just enough to peer at her, she could see his eyes already drooping with exhaustion although he stubbornly forced them open once more as they sank past half-mast and she sighed at the gesture. It was clear that this wasn’t going to make him any more willing to sleep and she bit her lip, realising that they couldn’t put off their more serious talk any longer, even though it was clear that he still needed a lot more sleep. However, before she could even start to come up with a way to start the conversation, Natsu had beaten her to it.

“You knew?” He asked quietly, voice hoarse from sleep and crying, trying to look everywhere but her and she winced at the despair and shame in his voice. Did he really think that she was going to judge him for having nightmares? No, she realised as she studied him for a long moment, he was more upset and worried about the fact that he had dragged her into this…that she was witnessing him like this, and she was tempted to shake him until he realised that it didn’t matter how he looked or acted, that all she cared about was helping him.

“I guessed,” She admitted quietly, and he glanced at her, his eyes stormy and she narrowed her eyes as she caught a glimpse of hope buried in their depths, unsure of what it meant and realising that she needed to tread carefully until she knew exactly what was going on in his head.  “Erza was the one that suggested it might be nightmares, but I was the one that remembered what you’d seen in Crocus…and that we never really had a chance to talk about what happened.” The way he glanced away again at her words told her that she had hit the nail on her head, although there was no elation at being proven right, only relief that she was going in the right direction.

    Natsu hesitated for a moment as he contemplated her words, as much as he had wanted to deal with this on his own, he couldn’t quite subdue the relief that came from having someone else know…no…from having Lucy know. She had been there; she had seen the same thing he had…and there was nothing but warm concern in her eyes as she waited patiently for him to sort out his whirling thoughts, her arms still warm around him, helping to keep the shadows at bay. His eyes darkened slightly as they landed on the damp patch on her top and he swallowed hard, she really had seen him at his weakest, and yet it didn’t seem as though she was going to pull away and that gave him the strength to make a decision.

“It’s different…”

“Different?” Lucy prompted when it became clear that he had frozen, and she waited until he looked at her before asking gently. “What do you mean?” Inside she was overwhelmingly relieved that he was beginning to reach out to her, but she carefully kept that off her face, as she knew that he could clam up at the slightest sign of censure or judgement.

“In my dreams…nightmares…whenever I get to her side, you disappear…” Natsu whispered, beginning to tremble as the nightmarish images flashed through his mind once more, and she reached out to grasp his hand once more when she sensed him beginning to slip. At once his fingers curled around her, and she was relieved to his eyes clearing somewhat as he focused on their linked hands, and his voice was slightly steadier as he continued although his expression was pained.  “And it’s you that’s dead, not the Future-Lucy and there’s nothing I could do to stop it or to change what happened.” A full body shudder went through him, and before she knew what he was doing, he had closed the distance between them, pulling his hand free of hers before wrapping his arms tightly around him, his voice shaking wildly as he added desperately. “I can’t lose you!”

“You haven’t,” Lucy murmured, recovering swiftly from her surprise as she wrapped her arms around him as well before adding softly. “And I have no intention of going anywhere anytime soon, so you’re stuck with me.” She knew that she couldn’t promise that she would be there forever, not after all the danger they had already faced and not with Erza’s warning ringing in her head, but she would promise him what she could.

“But…” Natsu protested weakly, desperately wanting to believe her words…needing to believe her words, but he couldn’t move past the point that even though real events had turned out fine, he hadn’t been able to protect her.  “I couldn’t protect her…you.”

“Maybe not,” Lucy agreed with a sigh, realising that he wouldn’t take it well if she pointed out the fact that it had just been something that no-one could protect against…or that there had been herself, Happy, Carla, Wendy and Loke there as well and none of them had been able to do anything either. Instead, she focused on something that he seemed to have forgotten in the face of his nightmares, and her voice was soft as she continued.  “But you kept your promise.  You protected our future, you made it so that her future wasn’t a hell ruled by those Dragons.” _You gave me a future, a chance to have many more adventures with everyone…with you…_

“But…”

“Natsu,” she cut across him gently, determined to get the fact that there was nothing he could have done through his thick skull, hating the lingering pain in his expression. “You did everything you could! You saved everyone! These nightmares are just that nightmares, and they’ll fade with time.” If he had managed to move past the nightmares about Lisanna, she had no doubt that he could get passed this as well, especially as she was right there beside him.

“I want to believe you…”

“We should have talked about this sooner,” Lucy said with a sigh, hearing the longing in his words, and wishing that she hadn’t just brushed the scene in the Palace to the side. But it had been the easiest thing to do at the time, especially as everything else had seemed so much more important…but nothing else that had happened had been enough to give Natsu nightmares. “It would have stopped these thoughts getting lodged in your head.”

“I didn’t want to make you remember…” Natsu admitted softly, knowing that he was equally responsible for brushing the situation aside back then, refusing to let her take to responsibility for everything.

“Idiot,” Lucy scolded in exasperation, and he blinked slightly as he realised that she was now glaring up at him with more than a hint of fire in her eyes.  “Sometimes you need to learn to put yourself first. Yes, that was a bad situation, and yes it bothered me…but I wasn’t the one who lost a loved one.” Natsu gaped at her, both because he had never viewed the situation in that light before, but also because he could feel his cheeks heating up at her words even as he frantically tried to look away so that she wouldn’t notice. _Loved one?_ Somehow he knew that she meant more than a friend or family member, or was that just how he was interpreting it? Was that how he felt about her, he knew that these nightmares were different and far worse than those he’d had after Lisanna had ‘died’ but he hadn’t understood why. _Lucy…_

    However, Lucy had already noticed, and she was somewhat flustered, having never seen him react in that way before even though he had walked in on her in various states of undress before, snuck into her bed and said things that most people would blush at without hesitation. She could feel her own cheeks heating up in response, barely resisting the urge to fall back on her usual reaction of chasing him away until she could calm down…if she did that now, it would undo whatever progress she had made, and there was no way she was going to let that happen. Instead she found her mind flashing back to her earlier conversation with Erza, it was clear that the red-head was aware of her feelings…possibly more aware than she was, even though they were her feelings, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that the older girl had meant something more when she had talked about Natsu caring about her. _But was she right?_ She wondered as she glanced at Natsu who was still trying to look anywhere but at her.

   Normally when they got to this stage, she would retreat, never confident enough to risk their friendship by trying for something more…always arguing that it was better to remain his best friend. However, this time she found herself reluctant to pull, partly because of the blush on his face, but more because of how he had reacted to her ‘death’…something telling her that he would not have reacted the same way if they’d lost any of the others. Still, it was hard to fight off months of dodging the issue, and she glanced around helplessly, wishing that she’d actually thought to ask for advice on this…although she wasn’t sure she would trust advice from any of her guild-mates. Swallowing, she decided to do it Natsu’s way, figuring that it was probably the best way to get through to the blockheaded Dragon-slayer.

“Natsu…” She whispered, startled at the speed with which he turned to look at her, and for a moment she froze, but as she stared into his wide, olive eyes, her doubts faded into the background. Not giving herself time to chicken out she closed the distance between him, pressing her lips gently against his, feeling an insane urge to giggle as his eyes grew even wider. However, when there was no sign of him responding she pulled back, already regretting her impulsive action but almost at once he let out a soft noise of protest, warm arms snaking around her once more and drawing her closer. This time he was the one to initiate the kiss, clumsy but sincere and she found herself smiling into the kiss…it was nothing like the ones that she’d dreamed about when she was younger, or that she wrote about in her stories, but it was perfect in its own way.

    When they broke away, they remained close enough for their breath to mingle, both of them bright red as they stared at one another, neither of them sure how to break the comfortable silence that had settled around them. Lucy smiled brightly at him, reaching up to gently run a thumb over his cheek, warmth suffusing her chest as he leant into her touch with a soft him.

“How do you feel?” She asked softly finally breaking the silence.

“Tired…” Natsu said after a moment before a brilliant grin spread across his face and she was delighted to see it had no trace of the darkness that had been tainting it the other day as he added softly. “And happy…”

“Sheesh, couldn’t you have at least said it the other way around?” She scolded playfully, unable to take offence as she knew that he had to be exhausted still…plus he was an idiot, and she wasn’t sure what she’d have done if he actually managed to come out with something overly romantic. Still, he at least had the grace to look sheepish as he muttered a quiet apology.

“Sorry…” 

“Idiot,” she said fondly, reaching up to tug gently on a wayward lock of hair, waiting to he met her gaze before adding with a smile.  “Come on let’s have a nap, then you can make it up to me.” He seemed torn between relief that she wasn’t really mad, embarrassment at the last bit and a lingering reluctance to sleep even though his eyes were beginning to droop once more.

“What about…?” He asked nervously, while he had to admit that she put things in a way that made him able to look back on what had happened with clearer eyes, he wasn’t sure that the nightmares would just disappear so easily and he was reluctant to let her see him in that state again.

“Seriously?” Lucy demanded with a pout, and he gaped at her wide-eyed, unsure of what to say as she continued sternly.  “Do you think you’re going to have nightmares after that?” She managed to hold the stern expression for another minute before dissolving into smiles with a soft laugh, her eyes bright as she watched him perk up at the change in her demeanour, pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek before adding tenderly.  “Even if you do, I’m going to be right here to chase it away again.” Natsu found himself unable to disagree in the face of her certainty and instead he nodded, smiling shyly at her before he snuggled closer, finally admitting to himself just how tired he still was.

“M’kay,” he mumbled sleepily as he pressed closer to her, and she smiled fondly at the child-like innocence in his expression as she curled around him. Resting her head against his chest so that she could hear his heartbeat, her smile growing when he rested his head against hers with a happy hum, although she was caught by surprise when she felt his lips brush her ear, his breath warm against her skin as he hesitantly whispered. “I l-like you too…”

 


End file.
